Axe Giant: The Wrath of Paul Bunyan (2013, Gary Jones)

Well, this sucked about as much as you'd expect. More cheapass straight-to-video campiness, rehashing the flash-in-the-pan "Sharknado" craze that inexplicably gained notoriety after sweeping the small screen. "Axe Giant" is about as good as THAT shit (which, in my book, means it sucks a pile of rotten donkey ass...), though it didn't catch on for whatever reason. I guess sharks falling on people is more entertaining to the American public. What the fuck do I know?

A handful of delinquent teens are sent on a camping retreat in the Minnesota mountains to be reformed. One of them finds the horn belonging to a long deceased Babe the Blue Ox (not realizing it obviously...) and takes it with him. This pisses off the evil ogre, Paul Bunyan, who emerges from his cave to look for the horn. Along the way a bunch of them are chopped up by his giant axe...

Every cliche in the book is used and the CG effects are beyond terrible, but it's obvious that they were being self-aware and intentionally 'silly' with it's retarded subject matter. This factor, however, doesn't impede on the overall suckiness of this shit heap. It's just boring and unamusing in it's over-the-top, cornball use of CG gore effects and it's overt use of green-screened backgrounds. And Joe Estevez is annoying as the zany, doom preaching hermit and the only nudity is provided by a butt-ugly ginger chick with no tits. There's nothing good about this movie, whatsoever.