Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Scarlet Fry's Junkfood Horrorfest (2007, Brian Crow, Scarlet Fry)


Anthology horror films are typically a well favored commodity for those looking for allegorical variety within the span of a normal length film. The beauty of the "anthology" is that you can almost always pick out your favorite segment (or, at least, the one you found sucked the LEAST). As far as "Scarlet Fry's Junkfood Horrorfest" goes - I can only describe it as the official anti-anthology horror film with absolutely NO discernible creativity or thought put into each of the 8+ shorts it contains.

Scarlet Fry - a guy who piddles around in the mega-low-budget horror scene - plays a backwoods zombie in the hacky wrap-around story, unamusingly introducing each bastardly "story". The first story, "Bloodthirsty Butcher", is simply about a morbidly obese man who is out of food so he lures a girl from a laundromat to eat her. Other stories are basically the same, in terms of brainlessness. Another story shows a man committing suicide in manner suspiciously similar to the beginning of Buttgereit's "Der Todesking". There's one about a satanist who kills his girlfriend/wife after she catches him in another ritual. My favorite segment, by far, has a bunch of over-aged skater punks who are offered drug money by an effeminate male prostitute in a parking garage. To be honest, I laughed my balls off at this scene.

Overall, "Junkfood Horrorfest" is just what the title suggests. Junky, micro-budget film making that anyone with a halfway decent (and ultimately immature) sense of humor and a six-beer buzz will get a kick out of simply based on how half-assed and LAZY the piece of shit is!

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